The Beach Boys Sing About Healthy Eating

5 Aug

This is a catchy little number — find it if you can. It’s included in their box set collection. The lyrics are pretty wacky — only the second pop song I’ve ever heard that mentions enemas. The other? That would be Frank Zappa’s sublimely ridiculous “Illinois Enema Bandit.”

“H.E.L.P. is on the Way”

Stark naked in front of my mirror
A pudgy person somehow did appear
Seems lately all I’ve eaten sugar and fat
It’s getting obvious that’s not where it’s at
A big pot and tripley chin
Oh what condition my condition was in
Laughing at myself at what a crying shame
What ever happened to my Greek godly frame

Cyclamates juicy steaks, sweet things too
Aren’t always good as they seem
Doughy lumps, stomach pumps, enemas too
That’s what you get when you eat that way

I read a book on organic foods
Jumped on a health food kick
Put me in the mood
You may not get to perfect overnight
But on the way you’re feelin’ clean out of sight
We ate tonight at Fairfax and 3rd
We’re gonna spread the news and give you the word
We hope that soon you’ll eat like we did today
We’re mighty thankful now that H.E.L.P.’s on its way
Salad with a special knock you right off your seat
With carrot juice to wash it all down
Yummy carob cookies are an organic treat
And H.E.L.P. has got the best food in town

H.-E.-L.-P.
H.E.L.P. your education creates much benefit and peace

Hamburgers and hot dogs throw ’em all out
You’ll feel so good you’ll jump up and shout
If you haven’t why don’t you go shopping today
And ‘member now that H.E.L.P. ‘s on its way

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